• frog_brawler@lemmy.world
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    11 days ago

    Weird… as a cis heterosexual white male, I don’t find myself hanging around people that I need to censor or correct at all. I’ve proactively cut all of those people out of my life within the past 8 years. My friends are the folks you don’t need to tell stuff like this to.

    I will say, in the process of removing people that were awful, they tend to just laugh when they are “corrected,” as they find amusement in the antagonization. Once you separate yourself from them, it’s just 2-3 confused text messages and that’s the end of it.

    • vinnymac@lemmy.world
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      11 days ago

      Not saying cutting people out is wrong, you do you. But don’t you think all of this alienation we are collectively doing is leading to the echo chambers that reinforce bad behaviors?

      • frog_brawler@lemmy.world
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        11 days ago

        I do, but I don’t want to be around those people. I don’t think being around them (and trying to influence) changes anything for the better either.

      • maniclucky@lemmy.world
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        10 days ago

        I can only control my own behavior. I cannot force another to change, they have to want to. The only thing I can do is draw the lines I’m willing to live within and live by them. And if not associating with bad people, even if they are family, is what I need to live in a healthy way, so be it.

      • solstice@lemmy.world
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        11 days ago

        I hear you, but idk what to do. I can’t engage with someone who says out loud things like “I want trump to become a dictator” and “democracy is overrated” and “your body my choice” and don’t seem to care at all that mass deporting 10+million people WILL lead to mass murder. It’s impossible to have a discussion in good faith with these people. They’ve just demonstrated that the last 8-9 years is a feature, not a bug, and let the mask off about who they really are. They’ve alienated themselves by leaving the realm of reality.

      • sudoer777@lemmy.ml
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        10 days ago

        I’m not really sure. One of the most common complaints among the less extreme portions of the right is that the left is too intolerant and strict and not fun to be around. And being more welcoming of the person themselves, even while acknowledging to yourself that their beliefs are severely flawed (possibly due to factors such as propaganda, peer pressure, religious beliefs), might be a way to help capture that crowd and work to win them over.

        At the same time, there needs to be a line drawn somewhere where the person is clearly being malicious and possibly dangerous and is a lost cause. Stuff like “your body my choice”, using slurs, praising suicides of marginalized people, etc isn’t worth tolerating. Also when it comes to group activities, allowing these sort of people and ideas makes minorities uncomfortable, so when they leave to someplace more comfortable now your group is just full of Nazis. I seen no problem with cutting these sort of people out.

    • BleatingZombie@lemmy.world
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      11 days ago

      I do (cuz family). Calling them out like this is one of my favorite pastimes since they think I’m 100% with them. Stopping them in their tracks can be really entertaining

      • sudoer777@lemmy.ml
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        10 days ago

        My family is conservative and I’m still dependant on them for healthcare, so calling them out usually isn’t worth it although sometimes I still do.

        • BleatingZombie@lemmy.world
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          10 days ago

          Please do what’s safest for you! The family I mentioned is actually my cousins’ in-laws, so there’s no real consequence

    • Wogi@lemmy.world
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      11 days ago

      They think this is a culture war. They believe they are at war with ideas they do not like.

      They will not give ground until forced to do so. They will only do so begrudgingly, and insincerely, waiting for the day they can claw it back.

      They see you as an enemy, and they give themselves rage chubbies at the thought of refusing to negotiate.

      Absolutely, if you hear this nonsense, call it out, but be prepared for it to escalate.

      Let’s return to a time when saying that crap out loud was enough to end a career. Make them afraid to be bigoted in public again.