I think Windows === Instant Coffee is perfect here

For sure!

I mean, Mint is a great distro.

Have you tried Arch, btw?

Deep nested menus were also much more common (including the start menu itself), and the menu items were often cramped closer together too. I used to turn the delay to zero because it was “cool” to see all the sub menus flying out everywhere as you moved your mouse up or down to where you actually wanted to go, but as they often popped over due to limited screen space it was actually a poor experience as you mentioned.

Still felt leet though.

That brings back memories!