I don’t know if I can completely explain the difference, but I would classify myself as a home labber not a self-hoster.
I use Proton for email and don’t have any YouTube/Twitter/etc alt front ends. The majority of my lab (below) is storage and compute for playing around with stuff like Kubernetes and Ansible to help me with my day job skills. Very little is exposed to the Internet (mostly just a VPN endpoint for remote lab work).
I view self-hosting as more of a, “let me put this stuff on the internet instead of of using a corporation’s gear” effort. I know folks who host their own Mastodon instance, have their own alt front ends for various social media, their own self-hoster search engines.
My homelab is three Lenovo M920q systems complete with 9th gen i7 procs, 24GB ram, and 10Gbps fibre/Ceph storage. Those mini PCs can be beasts.