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Hands you a random laptop.

“The thing doesn’t work.”

Refuses to elaborate and leaves.

I bought an LG microwave a few months ago to replace a dead 10 year old Sharp. My favorite “features”:

• The sticker on the door stating that by using the microwave I agree to LG’s TOS, including binding arbitration.
• The single 4 minutes and 30 seconds of use I got out of it before the magnetron broke.

When I returned it they customer service person asked if I wanted it serviced under warranty – hilarious. Bought a Panasonic instead.

I passed a 911 in an Opel Corsa at around 190kph (admittedly going downhill).

It was the highlight of my trip.

That’s the joke.

This is a parody of twitter posts made by actual “anti DEI/woke” dipshits. The format is identical to their posts “fixing” modern female video game characters that don’t look like sex dolls.

You’re not wrong, but the idea that “plant based” is “safe” isn’t right either. Plants can create all kinds of horribly toxic, carcinogenic compounds – especially when burned or heated.

Wood smoke of all things is mildly carcinogenic and we cook our food with it.

Modern bright lighting is great for daytime but one of the worst things we can do to ourselves in the evening or night. We absolutely did not evolve to be exposed to bright (particularly blue/white) light after the sun starts setting.

The best thing I did for my circadian rhythm was eliminate light in the bedroom and set up my lights to slowly shift to soft amber and dim in the evening. The trick is having it transition slowly so your eyes adjust and you don’t notice it.

My car had USB for Android Auto and it barely provides enough enough power to maintain my phone’s charge while in use.

Thankfully wireless charging makes that an easy problem to bypass.

Do you really need fast charging in public outlets?

I always bring my own charger or power pack with me for security and speed, but “yes”.

If I’m using a public outlet my device is nearly dead and I probably only have limited time to hang out and charge it.

There are jobs where it’s not feasible or practical to pay an actual human to do.

Human translators exist and are far superior to machine translators. Do you hire one every time you need something translated in a casual setting, or do you use something Google translate? LLMs are the reason modern machine translation is is infinitely better than it was a few years ago.

One of the major problems with LLMs is it’s a “boom”. People are rightfully soured on them as a concept because jackasses trying to make money lie about their capabilities and utility – never mind the ethics of obtaining the datasets used to train them.

They’re absolutely limited, flawed, and there are better solutions for most problems … but beyond the bullshit LLMs are a useful tool for some problems and they’re not going away.

Introduce a character that’s a teacher so sick of cellphones in their class they bought a jammer off the internet. Make that character the serial killer’s first victim.

How dare people cope with something horrible by making jokes. Everyone knows it’s impossible to make those jokes while simultaneously being horrified by and pushing back against the thing they’re joking about.

Step 1: Say “I have it for situations like this.”

Step 2: Adamantly refuse to let them use it. If it’s something that has to get done tell them to get the fuck out of the way and do it yourself.

They instance they’re on automatically censors certain words the admins consider slurs. “Bitch” is one of them.

I tried searching for “BSD memes” but all the results are for some cartoon by the same name.

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Because at some point society decided to call them refrigerators or AC. The thing *inside the refrigerator or air conditioner" that makes it work is called a “heat pump” – that’s the unambiguous name of the device. Just like the bit inside a car that provides motive force is called the “engine” or the “motor”.

The device that uses a heat pump to both heat and cool a building is actually called an Air source heat pump, but since that’s a mouthful most people simply call it a “heat pump” to distinguish it from traditional AC that only works to cool an area. Sure, maybe you get that odd area the calls it something different (my region calls soft drinks “pop”) but that’s not the norm.

I’ve had good beer and crappy beer in Germany: the same as the USA.

Turns out the idea that “small breweries generally make good beer, and industrial breweries make garbage” tends to be true worldwide.

“Quantum immortality” is magical thinking for people that aren’t comfortable with their own mortality. It’s functionally no different than belief in an afterlife.