“Oh, jokes just normally have a punchline and aren’t just stating something really backwards”

Ooh and how many women apparently wear the HIGHEST quality water proof make up at all times!

Realistic hacking scenes would be funny.

“Okay I’m in”

“Wait… how?”

“Oh I figured out the default passwords and naming conventions for new employees awhile ago.”

Funnily enough I got my college to change password policies because for a report for one of my classes I wrote about how stupid it was that all new users passwords were First intial + last initial + last four of social security number, with usernames being firstname + lastname + year. Since they had no max number of attempts on logins, and didn’t prompt you to change password on logging in, it took a few minutes to get into anyone’s account once you knew their name. (That school was very incompetent, and they are closed now)

OR

“Give me 20 minutes, I’m on hold with IT. They’ll reset the password and tell me it if I give them an employee ID, dob, and name. Which I see clearly on this guys facebook picture where he has his badge visibile.”

Or a hacking guy trying to brute force for days. Then the “no nonsense” guy goes out for 20 minutes, and comes back with it and refused to answer questions. Oh wait… that’s just XKCD.

Hehe that scene was the one that made me think of this post.

NCIS should just dive into self parody at this point.

Seeing a movie where they flip in a practice dummy and actually make me feel like they broke ribs to make it happen would be legit.

If the ribs aren’t bending, ain’t no way the heart is pumping!

Also having the CRP patient be absolutely trashed afterwards. If you’re getting CPR, it’s cause you dead, and they are trying to bring you back to life by beating life back into you. You were dead, then got probably the most painful beating of your life. The rest of the movie should be you recovering in a hospital.

I’m not even a chef but they’ll also turn in a full kitchen without regard sometimes.

If you’re turning, you keep that garbage pointed NOT where you are turning.

Ahh so when they have like inconsistent durability?

One scene the super hero slams through walls.

Next scene, they trip and get injured.

I wonder if movies is why people seem to scoff at my mom’s allergies. She is “deathly” allergic to Cilantro and Coriander, so more than once people told her stuff like “Don’t worry just eat around it” or “we’ll put it on the side”

MAM. Her throat is closing, we are sticking an epi pen, and heading to the hospital if any gets in her mouth. If you can’t accommodate her, let her know and we will leave. But it’s severe enough that if a lot of fresh cilantro is being used, she has to leave or she’ll start having symptoms. Basically if you can clearly smell cilantro, then enough is in the air that she’s going to start coughing and wheezing and normally takes 2-3 days of her feeling garbage. Same exact case for my sister who is deathly allergic to red onions.

I never understood why some people think so little of “My throat will close if I eat this thing”, but maybe it’s TV where they treat it like lactose intolerance, where it’s fine if you just take the meds with it?

IDK man, but it’s tilting.

They wanted to hack faster, so they both started typing at once!

https://tenor.com/view/double-keyboard-ncis-gif-14884655

The logic in that TV show would be parody if all they did was have a single character look super confused whenever one of their pseudoscientific plans work flawlessly and is held up in court.

I’m just the ultimate Lemmy Meme lord!

My most upvoted one is this one though:

https://lemmy.world/post/19883899

But yeah it’s always cool when we get so much engagement and every comment is actually unique and not a report bot!

“Or any monster chase or fight. If a giant monster chases you it’s faster and instant-kills you. But not in movies.”

Monster: struggles to catch a running humans

Monster in next scene: catching up with a car pretty easily

Speed always kills me in things.

Plot twist= It started at 8PM and ended at 3 pm.

That always killed me! Like… bro, a soft breeze should take him out. He’s not ready to be a villain, he’s ready to spend 5+ years in rehab.

I’d love if in one of those shows it’s just implied lightly throughout the entire thing that they are squatting in the home of someone who died and the city never noticed or something stupid like that XD

Wild. With how gnarly residency is you’d THINK most of them would be ground out, but guess some folks just see those dollar bills working as a corporate doctor.

So like did he complete his residency then head straight for insurance field?

The happiest birthday makes me upset.

Because his point is so stupid, but I can’t argue at all.

His choice would be a legendary birthday. Your friends would know your birthday before they knew their parents’ birthdates.

I actually like doing training!.. for people who want to be there, you know?

I like doing trainings for people who are like “I want to learn XYZ, can you help?” Sure! We’ll get management approval and get that scheduled and hopefully it’ll make your life easier.

More procedural required stuff? Bleh.

I’m not even in management, I’m just a senior employee that gets voluntold to run trainings.

I feel like they could be the main characters in a dozen different movies.

Buddy cop film where old style cop has to team up with young tech assassin.

Average man tries to solve a murder while being hunted by a cyborg

Young group of hackers led by this woman is being hunted by corrupt police as they try to expose the government.

Like either one of them could be the protagonist or antagonist of any number of movies depending on the genre, or team up for a clash of styles type think.