My parents didn’t smoke but that’s literally how I knew the babysitter was gone and my parents were home from a night out.

There’s a real time and place for every human being to eat the sloppiest sandwich ever made. And it’s fucking delicious. Every time.

Making new frens every day

The Bert’s Gambit

That brake check maneuver is going to haunt her for decades.

Fight you? You wouldn’t even try fighting back except during the playoffs, Kareem!

Also Billie Joe: Openly bisexual since 1995. Love the one you’re with. That’s literally the only thing that matters.