it used to be trout, they had to pivot to salmon for supply chain reasons

The third rule of fight club, is everybody is named Bruce.

He’s like the George Washington Carver of rock n roll.

That chicken is SO white, it took credit for inventing rock n roll.

Infusion - Daylight Hours

Norbit.

I mean, it was questionable then too. But looking back on how Eddie Murphy decided to tank his career says a lot about how comedians of the time loved punching down.

I wonder if the divorce is a result of her killing enough of their dogs to finally call it quits.

I haven’t checked lately, is the price still on the can, though?

Feeling a bit less like a prize asshole.

I’m not gonna use a ladies dildo, I’m a man! Bring me a small man’s dildo please!

toxic old boss from before i got my professional job.

In this house, we don’t call 911… but if you need us to, we can look up the number for professional services to get you the actual help you need instead of inviting police brutality.

that’s like, 500% wheelier than the industry leading wheel

wholesale cadavers, local and organic

Pick up that phone and call a boomer right now! We got Victorian boomers, Rococo boomers, Renaissance boomers, Pre Columbian boomers, Fertile Crescent boomers, Paleolithic boomers. The oldest toughest boomers are waiting for your call.

fire can’t go through doors stupid! it’s not ghosts!

what a coincidean

me and a buddy came to an agreement years ago: slutty Halloween costumes are only ok if the person clearly looks like Bugs Bunny in the slutty costume.

goon platoon

3 Democrats considered great, Clinton getting average recognition, neither of the Bushes get a mention, no Reagan.

Bravo! this is quite the shitty post