What if they added tractors

I’m so glad all I ever did in politics is build some homeless shelters a few decades ago. Shouldn’t be enough to get me noticed.

Nah, the electrical college is supposed to prevent some of this shit

Yeah, but what quality blood are you getting? Vampires hunt. They select. “hey come lookitthis afore I flush it!” is going to get you some dudes, but they’re gonna taste bad.

Why would people have fewer destinations that they are trying to reach? Or is this just “you don’t have to maintain them as roads, now you have to maintain them as railroads lol” sophistry

Gotta be honest, it doesn’t make sense to cross the Rockies on rail as is right now. We’ve either gotta get japan speed from Washington state to LA then over to Dallas with north south lines up to Utah, Idaho and Montana or drill straight fucking through the damn mountains. It takes 24 hours to take a train direct from Sacramento to SLC. I can drive that in 12 (breaks included) or fly that in 3 (including airport time), all for around the same cost (if I get cheap tickets). I haven’t even looked at the train from SLC to Denver or anywhere on the other side of the Rockies, but I’m sure it’s just as ridiculous.

Don’t get me wrong, the train through the Sierras can be gorgeous, but I don’t want to spend 24 hours traveling when I could be spending 3. We only get so much time off.

We’ve still got the major line going through our town, but the spurs, what connected to the mines and factories, are all paved over. I moved across town a decade ago, and the train went by a mile away at 1am at the old place. I now wake up at 1am every night because there’s no damn train. I should probably set a short, quiet, train honk alarm or something and see if that helps.

Just lay rails in the lane. Turn it into, I dunno, a fuck you I’m a train lane

I remember reading something (unauthoritative?) about Microsoft (maybe it was a decade ago at least) working on self driving cars and deciding the only way to get it to work safely was to put rfid tags in the road and the other cars and the postboxes and the children and the everything.

I think what they want is trains with individual private cars that can automatically choose the tracks you want by selecting a destination. Which would be fucking awesome it’s how I thought cars worked when I was 4, I swear all the steering wheel did was change lanes (my folks were good drivers I guess).

Your 80 year old dad used DOS. Make your 30yo use it for a year exclusively and he’ll be fine

I was today years old when I found out they were different groups

Not every woman is white

I fucking lived it. Do primary sources work for you?

Come on over, I’ll put on a pot of bear shit coffee and see if you disagree

Okay I’ll learn how to make better coffee

I love strawberries, that sounds awful, and next strawberry season I would love to try it. Could I have a recipe?

but if ghosts are real what am I gonna eat. i like eating

you know I was prepared to argue the point but I realized, the articles I enjoy and save are the satirical ones. there are a lot that are just plain parody that I just skim over. But they had to call themselves parody in the best legal brief ever written, dammit.

Onion isn’t parody, it’s satire