Guys, is it gay to avoid filling your trash can with a bunch of plastic bags?

It has been my long-standing belief that a motorcycle helmet can prevent an accident. I’ve had too many things hit my visor while riding. Imagine taking a june bug in the eye with nothing but a set of oakleys for protection.

I have a motorcycle. It’s a Harley-Davidson. Immediately, everyone is picturing a large and unpleasant looking bearded man riding a huge, noisy, vibrating, chrome bedazzled air cooled motorcycle without a helmet from one bar to the next.

My harley makes about as much noise as a Toyota Camry. I wear full protective gear when riding it, including a bright and attention-getting helmet. It doesn’t get ridden to bars, because drinking interferes with my motorcycle addiction.

The large and unpleasant looking bearded man part is accurate, though.

Lol, he won’t have money or time for that fancy paint job if he has to keep that rotary engine alive.

Men, proudly drag that battered and cracked android phone out on the first date, it’s a litmus test for shallow people, apparently.

I went on a first date with a girl I met from work. She farted loud enough to be heard over drunken yelling and music in the steakhouse we were in, immediately after saying “I don’t get embarassed”.

In a couple of weeks, we will have been together for 16 years. We’ve been married for 14 years. We cook together every evening, we hold each other whenever we are in the same room for more than five minutes, and on the rare nights where we aren’t taking each other’s clothes off, we fall asleep wrapped around each other. I would have missed out on a perfect relationship if I had judged her for a phone.