I promise I’m not a doomsday prepper or anything, just a person in my 30s who grew up in poverty and has only recently gotten to a point of being slightly above water. We are aware that having a child would immediately bring us back to scraping by, which means that we may not be able to afford any extras for said child. No dance classes, no preschool, no crayons with the sharpener on the back. Just stressed out parents who won’t be able to give as much attention and care due to burnout and survival mode. That doesn’t sound nice for anyone involved… The kinder thing for me to do is either wait till we’re in a better financial state(where aging and inflation works against us) or just accept we won’t have them. Our plan, as I said, is to eventually foster and hopefully adopt from there, because by the time we feel financially stable enough to support another human in our world, I’ll probably be too old for a safe pregnancy.(Which I’m disgusted by as well, but that’s a whole different issue)

This isn’t a situation where I’m worried about the world blowing up, it’s accepting that we’ll either be trapping ourselves and a child in poverty and continuing that cycle we both came from or dealing with a high risk geriatric pregnancy and a baby in our 40s.

You’re getting downvoted, but I kinda agree with you. I think if someone is ready and has hope for the future, sure, it makes sense for them to have a kid. I think a lot of people are aware the world sucks and the future of that child may be uncertain/bleak, many people have kids cause it’s “the next step” in adulting, sometimes always wanted to be a parent. The obvious hope is that the future will figure it out. I would like to think most aren’t being overly selfish, just following the flow.

My husband and I want kids, but the thought of bringing someone into our current world, and with our financial restraints, it seems cruel from my perspective… Like, the kindest thing I could do for a future child of my own womb would be to just not have them currently. (Plus, ew pregnancy) We’ve been looking into adoption from foster care once we feel financially ready because those kiddos are already here and need a supportive home.

My husband wants kids, I’m okay without for the same reasons as you and a big disgust of pregnancy. I have a lot of experience with kids in my career and we love kids, but it just seems the kindest thing to do for them is to not bring them into this world. We’re planning on fostering once we’re in a better financial position and hopefully adopting from there. I’d rather grow our family with a kid or toddler that already got the shit luck of being here.

My local store flagged me cause I had my coffee cup in the cart. It said, “you only scanned 5 items” and it thought I had 6 in the cart. I was a bit surprised cause I didn’t know it was that far of a view.